Can you briefly introduce yourself?
I am a Blue Book trainee at the European Commission, in the cabinet of Commissioner Johannes Hahn, who is in charge of Budget and Administration. I did my undergraduate degree at the University of Ljubljana, Faculty of Economics. During this time, I spent half a year as an exchange student in the Netherlands. After that, I received a full-time athletic scholarship to the University of San Francisco (USF) in California, where I studied Applied Economics. At the same time, I was an NCAA athlete, competing and representing my university. Alongside that, I was a professional athlete for 12 years; I ran track and field, more specifically, the 400 metres hurdles. My biggest achievements were participating twice in the World Championships and four times in the European Championships, breaking the national record in 4x400m relay. The whole time, I combined athletics with my studies. I did not have a gap year and it did not take me any longer to finish my studies. I did it while being an athlete. This meant many hard hours of training and practice, but it was worth it.
What does failure mean to you?
Firstly, you need to look at my background to understand how failure affected me. If you want to be a student athlete, you need to prioritise things and you need to work hard. I eliminated all non-essential activities while I was studying and training, simply to be able to achieve the yearly goals that I set myself. Every year, I would set myself goals, such as how fast I wanted to run, in order to achieve specific targets, which would then lead me to high-level competitions. I would also set myself goals for school. I used to write my goals in specific spots around the house, where I would look at them on a regular basis to affect my subconscious. Prioritising was the most important thing for me; planning my days and being constantly focused. For many years, I did not know what failure was because I would set myself goals and every year I would achieve them. I thought working hard meant ultimately achieving something; that it meant rising, growing and being successful. So when I failed the first time, I did not cope with it well. I started asking myself why it happened. Was I not good enough? Was I not capable enough? I did not believe in myself. That is when I failed the second time. I failed in coping with failure. I think that was the hardest thing for me, and a big lesson moving forward.
Can you share with us the situation in which you feel you failed? How did you overcome it? Do you think that you have learned something from this situation?
The reason for my failure was mostly caused by the pandemic. I was studying in America and in the middle of the last track season of my career. I knew that it would be my last season and I needed to do everything possible to reach my full potential at the end of my career. So I set myself goals. I was working really hard and then the coronavirus situation happened and the season immediately stopped. We could not compete anymore. That was a shock for me because I was not able to achieve what I wanted to. At the same time, I graduated, but there was no official graduation, which did not leave me feeling that I had achieved something that year. Then, I started applying for jobs in the USA and because of the situation, the job market was terrible, especially for international students. I struggled for three months without finding a job, which was not very good for my mental well-being. Eventually, I had to return home to Slovenia, saying goodbye to my boyfriend and dearest friends. The transition to a completely different environment, after living in America for two years, was a real shock and that is when I felt I had not achieved what I would wanted to. That feeling stuck with me for a long time. That was my failure. I decided to pursue a new profession and leave my athletics career behind. Once I found a job, I started getting better and eventually I got to where I am now (a Blue Book trainee).
But how did I overcome it? I still struggle sometimes, I am still figuring out each day how to move forward. However, I took something from that failure. My advice would be that everyone should take the risk and put their fear aside. Even if you fail, do not give up, and continue to believe in yourself. Try to be surrounded by people who support you. I learned that failure is a necessary part of chasing the dream and I believe that everyone should fail at least once; you do not live if you do not fail. It is good to fail because you learn something, and learning how to overcome failure will bring you success. In a nutshell, failure will bring you success!